November 2019

Judyth Sult’s November Empowerment Newsletter

Free Card Draw Here

Notes from J

Happy November and Thanksgiving. Here in the Northwest the colorful leaves and the temperature is falling. It’s a great time to snuggle up with a good book and hot cup or tea or chocolate – or my newsletter!

In this issue you will find an article about how to change someone’s behavior if they are abusing your boundaries. I’ve also included a gratitude ritual for Thanksgiving as well as for a daily practice. It’s a good reminder to set a goal of being grateful for at least one thing every day. This practice can go a long way towards lifting your spirits and your daily focus.

Be well, be thankful and bless your life,

J

Coaching Corner

How to Ask a Person to Change Behavior

As an empowerment coach my focus is on how my clients can make decisions that bring more joy and satisfaction in their lives. An area that may be challenging is to establish boundaries so that my client feels empowered to live with less stress and more self confidence. Holding to the boundaries may require a person in my client’s life to make changes.

For example, my client may feel the person is constantly disrespectful of time or space needs. Or an individual may not respect my client’s opinions or priorities. Below are some strategies for when you feel your boundaries have not been respected and the other person needs to make a change of behavior.

1. Listen to the words you are using in demanding a change. For example, saying, “I want you to stop [fill in the blank],” does not show any consideration for what the other person wants. Another approach would be to say, “Having you [fill in the behavior] doesn’t work for me. What might we agree to that would work for both of us?”

This approach can lead to a discussion that includes the individual in the decision that affects him/her directly and possibly create a compromise that works for both of you.

2. Consider habits you have developed that allow, or even encourage, the undesired behavior to continue. If you have accepted, or put up with the undesired behavior in the past, then you have trained the person to think that there are no consequences for not making the change.

It’s up to you to decide the consequences of continued unwanted behavior. It’s important to determine if you will really carry through with the consequences because when you don’t carry through you are giving permission for the unwanted behavior to continue.

3. Be certain that you hear what the person says about why they are refusing to change. You may, or may not be sympathetic to the reasons, but hearing those reasons can give you insight into how the person values the behavior and the relationship with you.

Sometimes you may repeatedly request a change of behavior and the person refuses to change. In that case it suggests that there is no buy-in or benefit to the person you are talking to. It can mean that the person does not care why you want the behavior to change because it’s more satisfying for the behavior to continue as is.

The holidays can be stressful for many families. Become empowered by establishing your boundaries now to minimize the anxiety and chaos for a more relaxed season.

Gratitude Ritual

A life that focuses on being grateful in the world is a happier, less stressful life. It doesn’t mean that you won’t have moments of doubt or even anger, but focusing on thankfulness will take the steam out of negative feelings.

Thanksgiving is a good time to share with family and friends those things for which you are thankful. Take a moment before your meal for each person to specifically say at least one thing for which they are grateful.

This is also a good time of the year to start a daily ritual to remind yourself of those things that make you grateful. This ritual only takes a few minutes, but if it’s done in the morning you can set your mood for the day. When you do it in the evening you can remind yourself of good things no matter how your day went.

For this ritual a small notebook is usually best. Keep the notebook in the same place and add to it at the same time each day. Hand writing, rather than typing, your gratitude magnifies the impact. Date the entry and write at least one thing for which you are grateful.

Be descriptive. Rather than writing, “I’m grateful for my home,” you might write, “I’m grateful for the beautiful sunsets I see from the warmth of my home.”

Be mindful of expressing your feelings. You can say something like, “I’m grateful for the feeling of joy I get while watching my child successfully get through a recent struggle in life.”

I’m grateful that many of you have told me that you like my newsletter and that I have had the discipline to bring it to you each month. Happy Thanksgiving

Cards for November 11th Month

Justice

Know that everything is connected

Be aware, all actions have consequences

Act with balance, fairness and harmony

Lady Justice will always serve you in truth

When Justice comes up in a reading, it suggests that you are being called upon to make a decision to balance actions fairly and without prejudice according to the rules in play. It is time to be mindful that there are consequences to every deed.

You are empowered when you remember that the established rules affect the present, as the present rules will affect the future. Everyone must be following the same rules for decisions and outcomes to be fair.

Click here for more information about this card.

                                                                                 High Priestess

You have the knowing

Call on your intuition

Meditate on the true law of the Universe

As you sit on the seat of wisdom

The High Priestess represents the highest moral standard, which stands above the man made law. You connect to the High Priestess through your high self by engaging your intuition, meditation, dreams.

You are empowered as the High Priestess when you sit in the listen to the internal wisdom, listening and trusting your inner voice.

Click here for more information about this card.

Awakening

Release old paradigms and patterns

Listen to your intuition

Choose freedom

Celebrate who you are and soar to your highest potential

Awake!

Awakening often indicates a time of reaching a knowingness that is beyond those around you. This card is about listening to your higher self by using a combination of reasoning and intuition.

You are empowered to discard the old models and celebrate yourself as you move to the next stage in your life and ascend past the old and outdated self.

Click here for more information about this card.

October 31 to November 12, Mercury Retrograde which is a time when Mercury appears to be moving in the opposite direction of its orbit. There may be confusion or break downs around communication, electronics or transportation.    

November 12, Full Moon, in Taurus is a time to enjoy sensual and creative experiences in a grounded way. Enjoy friendships and artistic expressions to produce or experience through art, music, and food.

November 26, New Moon in Sagittarius, is about setting your intentions to find joy and adventure in traveling.